“Yes, someone once asked if I could massage their cat. (I declined.)”
Let’s be real: My job isn’t all zen music and cucumber water. Sometimes, it’s more like a comedy show. Here are real (but anonymized) moments from my table:
The “Wait, What?” Hall of Fame
Client A: “Can you make my aura less… beige?”
My response: “I’ll stick to muscles, but here’s a crystal. (It’s from eBay.)”Client B: Mid-massage snores so loud, my plants vibrate.
Client C: “My partner says I’m tense. They’re the reason I’m tense.”
My diplomacy: “Let’s focus on your trapezius, not your divorce.”
Why I Love My Job
Because beneath the quirks, I get to witness real transformations. Like the lawyer who cried because she finally relaxed, or the builder who said, “I haven’t slept this good since the ’90s.”
Book Your Session (Cat-Free Zone)
LondonMassage4U.co.uk | 07786 971943
P.S. No aura adjustments, but I’ll fix your neck.
